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Mendhi and Peethi
A day before the wedding the palm and feet of the bride are decorated with
"Mendhi". A canopy or mandap decorated with flowers is erected at the place
of wedding. On the wedding morning, various ablutionary rituals are performed
on both the bride and the groom in their own homes. Their bodies are anointed
with turmeric, sandalwood paste and oils, which cleanse the body, soften the
skin, and make it aromatic. They are then bathed to the chanting of Vedic
mantras
Laya (Laja) Homa : The Oblation of Parched Grain
Here the bride offers sacrifice of food (poured into her hands by her brother or
someone acting in her brother's behalf) to the Gods for their blessings. "This
grain I spill. May it bring to me wellbeing and unite you to me. May Agni hear
us." He then asks the bride to spill the grain into the fire, saying: "This woman
scattering grain into the fire, prays: Blessings on my husband. May my relatives
be prosperous".
Baarat (Wedding Procession)
The Bridegroom arrives for the wedding along with his family and friends in a
procession. They are then received by the bride's family and friends.
Commencement of Marriage
The priest commences the marriage under a canopy that is specially decorated
for the ceremony. The priest invokes blessings of God for the couple to be
married. The bride offers yogurt and honey to the groom as a token of purity
and sweetness. The bride greets the groom by placing a garland around his
neck and the groom reciprocates. Both are congratulated by guests. The priest
invokes the memory and blessings of forefathers of the bride and the groom
for this auspicious occasion.
Kanya Danam (Giving Away of the Daughter)
The bride accepts her change of status from an unmarried woman to a wife by
spreading turmeric powder on her hands. Kanya Danam is performed by the
father (or uncle of guardian) of the bride in presence of a large gathering that
is invited to witness the wedding. The father pours out a libation of sacred
water symbolizing the giving away of the daughter to the bridegroom. The
groom recites Vedic hymns to Kama, the God of love, for pure love and
blessings. As a condition for offering his daughter for marriage, the father of
the bride requests a promise from the groom for assisting the bride in realizing
the three ends : dharma, artha, and kama. The groom makes the promise by
repeating three times that he will not fail the bride in realizing dharma, artha
and kama.
Paanigrahana or Hasta Milap (Holding the Hand)
The bridegroom stands facing west and the bride sits in front of him facing
east. He seizes her hand and recites Vedic hymns for happiness, long life, and
a lifelong relationship When the Bridegroom Takes the Bride's Hand, He Says :
"O Sarasvati, gracious one, rich in off spring, you whom we hymm first of all the
Gods, may you prosper this marriage. "I seize your hand."
Vivaaha (Wedding)
The bride and the bridegroom face each other, and the priest ties their
garments (the bride's saree to the groom's shirt) in a knot, symbolizing the
sacred union. The bride and the bridegroom garland each other and exchange
the rings. Next the nuptial fire, symbolizing the divine witness, and the sanctifier
of the sacrament, is installed and worshipped. Both the bride and the groom
grasp their hands together and pray to God for His blessings. Samagree,
consisting of crushed sandalwood, herbs, sugar, rice, ghee (clarified butter),
and twigs is offered into the sacred fire to seek God's blessings for the couple.
Agni Parinaya : The Circumambulation of the Fire
The bridegroom holds the bride by the hand and both walk three times around
the nuptial fire. Both offer oblations and recite appropriate Vedic hymns to
Gods for prosperity, good fortune, and conjugal fidelity. They touch each
others heart and pray for union of their hearts and minds While walking around
the bridegroom repeats: "First now they bring to you in bridal procession this
Surya, guiding her steps in circular motion. Return her now, O Agni, to her
husband as rightful wife, with hope of children to come." Then the entire rite is
repeated twice more, beginning with the rite of the fried grain. At the fourth
round she pours into the re all the fried grain from the mouth of the winnowing
basket saying: "To Bhaga Svaha!"
Asmaarohana or Shilarohana (Mounting the Stone)
At the end of each round of nuptial fire, both the bride and the groom step on a
stone and offer a prayer for their mutual love to be firm and steadfast like the
stone.
Satapadi (Seven Steps)
This is the most important rite of the entire ceremony. Here the bride and the
bridegroom take seven steps together around teh nuptial fire (Agni) and make
the following seven promises to each other :As per the Vedic rituals, the
bridegroom sings the following : With God as Our Guide, Let Us Take,
• the first step to nourish each other
• the second step to grow together in strength
• the third step to preserve our wealth
• the fourth step to share our joys and sorrows
• the fifth step to care for our children
• the sixth step to be together forever
• the seventh step to remain lifelong friends,
• the perfect halves to make a perfect whole. After the seventh step he makes
her remain where she is and says: "With seven steps we become friends. Let
me reach your friendship. Let me not be severed from your friendship. Let your
friendship not be severed from me." The Saptapadi ceremony concludes with a
prayer that the union is indissoluble. At the end of this ceremony, the
bridegroom and bride become husband and wife. In some communities such as
Gujarati, instead of seven, only four steps, signifying Artha, Dharma, Kama and
Moksha are taken.
Mangal Sutra Dharana
The Mangala suthra Dharana is the tying of the thread containing the marks of
the Vishnu or Shiva in the neck of the bride by the groom.
Suhaag or Sindhoordana
The groom places sindhoor (red powder) on the bride's hair symbolizing her as
a married woman.
Post-Marriage Game Playing
There are several regional variations to this ceremony.
Aeki-Beki
In the groom’s house a game called aeki-beki is played, by placing a ring and
several coins in a tray of water which is colored by vermilion and milk. It is said
that the person who finds the ring four times, will rule the house.
Talambra
In many South Indian marriages the rice mixed with the turmeric is poured over
the heads of groom and bride, by bride and groom. After this there are
ceremonies of name calling singing and other games aimed at the bringing the
bride and the groom closer.
Arundhati Darshan
Arundhathi Darshana is the showing of the Saptha Rishi Mandala and the small
star Arundhathi underneath the star of Vashistha. These seven sages and
their families are the originators of the Vedic Lore of the Hindus. In memoriam
of these great sages the seven stars in the Great Bear constellation are
named after them. The significance of this ritual is to remind the couple of the
cosmic responsibilities they have to fulfill. Darshan of these Great Sages is
intended to remind the couple the heritage they have to carry and the debt to
the sages they have to pay.
Dhruva Darshan - Looking at the Polestar
After sunset he shows her the polar star, saying: "You are firm and I see you.
Be firm with me, O ourishing one! Brhaspati has given you to me, so live with me
a hundred years bearing children by me, your husband."
Aashirvaad
The groom's parents bless the couple and offer cloth or flower to the bride
(now their daugher-in-law), symbolizing her joining of the groom's family. All
those assembled shower flowers on the couple and bless them completing the
marriage.
Grahapravesha - Entering the Home
The couple depart from the girl’s house after the vidai , for the groom’s house.
They carry behind the couple the sacred fire in a vessel. They should keep the
fire constantly alight. When they reach his house, he says: "Enter with your
right foot. Do not remain outside." The bride enters the home placing the right
foot - considered auspicious, first. When the bride and the groom enter the
groom's house, the mother of the groom welcomes the bride by doing an arati.
They sit silently until the stars are visible.
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